The Bhery EG EGYPTIANS!

Insipid Emotions. Infertile Thoughts. Late night Moorings. The days are long. The nights are longer.

The nights are harder because we are scoffed being a part of the debauched bachelor species. We are alienated by people because of our ineptitude to have a trans-gulf battle of minds.

It’s been a long time we, that’s me n KP, haven’t been able to manage the lower rungs of Maslow’s hierarchy. The basic needs. Wants. Blah. (Hate me for being a marketing faffer now). The redlings of bluelands from the netherworlds of Mars have killed the desire to communicate amongst the earthlings. I wonder how I get my daily kicks in that. These very wiselings apparently gave our planet the Pharaohs, the Sphinx, the people from the other era apparently control your destiny which though is anyways attached to a million more strings. Yes, they are the Egyptians.

And you better dread every birth and rebirth, and wonder why did the phoenix arose out of the ashes, while you are inching closer to the revolutionary discussion you may have with them.. Because that’s how long it would take for Che to turn around the economy of the entire Copacabana beach and bring democracy to Cuba.

You see them on their asses with a mafia-like air around them which would of course be intoxicated with the Sheesha fume. So you maintain the basic etiquette of some distance between the Indian and Egyptian nose, not because your moral science teacher taught you when you didn’t know you are going to meet the citizens of Pyramidland, but because as u move perilously closer, the Extra mouth freshener that you might be chewing would pop out of your mouth and pop into the alien’s mouth.

Whoever said we could avoid the Indian stink when you get out of the country.

And just when you thought that you knew English better than Queen Victoria’s grandmother, you would say “English Maafi”. When you devour English down to the basic anatomy, and feel bad that this is the language you love so much, you would give it away to the non-English speaking breed. But still, this urge to be a superman and take the world and its grandmother is strong. So, its more like rape. When you can’t resist it you might as well enjoy it. I have started loving the conversations as much as the Egyptian lemon. Pretty much in love with them.

So with Nicolai Machiavellian flair, I have basically been ruling many a conversations these days. Official spokesman I have become.

To A, here’s a post that’s basic. For a change, I didn’t sit with my lexicon ;) .

That’s dictionary BTW. ;)

Pre- Alien Land Woes

So I toiled through my drudgery in a PSU-like unit, which proudly claims itself as NIT. Yes, it’s the institute of national (un)importance.

It apparently belts out engineers from the land that till yesterday was preaching tribalism. Fissures appeared in a monolithic state and the world and its grandmother doffed it’s hat for all the “Sable Badhiyas”.

Till today I am ( or perhaps was ) proud to belong to this unit and beyond.

The trouble started brewing with the plans of joining a risk-consultancy in an alien land. The consultancy’s first faux pas was to take an uncalculated risk of hiring a not so lesser mortal like me. Then there were more risks involved with the denizens of this netherworld to go through the Sarkari hierarchies to be a part of the elite consultants on foreign shores.

The point is that the University of the Same Institute (yeah that’s how MS-Word turns it into, definitely not the name of the university ;)) which very reluctantly gave me the certificates I needed has already achieved eminence for being the crown-prince of all the losers by setting the worst benchmarks of all time. Having achieved that feat conspicuously, the institute is willing to do a comparable job in pushing people for a Japanese forte called hara-kiri.

Through the circuitous ways of their life am still valiantly surviving the ordeal of getting a, what we call in our world, signature. Much to my chagrin, the work never gets completed. For a long while I thought that “Mind Fucked” was in the unlimited vocabulary of my better half. It ceases to amaze me at the Recency-Frequency-Decency-Blahcy of the usage of the same term at my end. The downgrades from the pleasing to plebeian ways of mine have not been very smooth either. Neither do I particularly appreciate it. Never at my clairvoyant best would I have thought of an existence like this.

For all these saturnine days because of the asinine slovenly B@s-Turds at the institute am mind fucked.

For the road to the legendry kingdom of El Dorado which is paved with obnoxious dickheads, am resplendently ready.

For all those who empathize with my feelings, my gratitude and those who don’t, I don’t care.

For all those people who have invited expletives enough from my side to deserve the hottest furnace in hell, I can’t find what the French call Mot Juste.

Speaking of French, I just recalled that I learnt German. Ich spreche Deutsche. The German air force and one of my quizzing roomies’ team was called Luftwaffe. They should perhaps obliterate the above mentioned species.

May the force be with me.

Adios.